There have been 999 billion parenting books written over the past decade alone. OK, that may be a slight exaggeration, but the act of parenting is a complex one that often leaves fully capable adults desperately seeking external guidance.
The truth is this: There are no easy answers to the many questions that accompany parenting.
Many of the biggest lessons are learned “on the job” and through trial and error. During this process, you will develop your own parenting style that will be driven by your expectations, temperament and communication skills.
Child development researchers have pinned down three styles of parenting and how they affect children. What’s your style?
Authoritarian
This group of parents can be described as extremely strict and highly controlling of their child’s behavior. There is not a lot of give-and-take exercised within this approach, as children are expected to remain obedient in all settings and situations.
Researchers have found that children raised by authoritarian parents are slow to develop their own sense of self and expression.
They are generally well-behaved and reliant on the voice of authority to drive their life decisions.
Authoritative
Described as a more moderate approach to parenting, authoritative adults still expect a lot out of their children, but are more willing to compromise on some issues.
They set limits but rely on natural consequences for children to learn from making their own mistakes. Authoritative parents foster more collaboration with their child, encouraging them to discuss their points of view and how they are feeling about certain situations.
Children raised by this style of parents have been found to be independent and respectful of others.
Permissive
Also labeled indulgent, this set of parents treat their children like peers. They are warm and accepting of their child’s feelings and needs and exert little or no control over their behavior.
They generally allow children to set their own limits, schedules, bedtimes and eating habits. They are submissive in nature, especially compared to authoritarian and authoritative parents, and depend more on their children to make and follow rules.